Release

I haven't written any music in a long time. This is sad. But today I picked up Ferris (my washburn guitar) and we spent some time together. Along with many other things, I played a song I wrote a little over a year ago. It has all the elements of a good song. Good (but simple) chords, easy to follow, and maybe even catchy. But what i like about it the very most is the fact that the lyrical value means so much to me. I tried recording it today on my mac and it may have worked, but until then I'll just post the lyrics then I'll explain the lyrics, making me vulnerable, but hey, it's made me stronger :)

The song is called (drumroll please)

Release

Verse 1

You seem to think that it was easy

That's the farthest from the truth

You laid a hand against my face

Said I deserve those things you do

It was too late when I walked out

Found a way out of your arms

But your words taunt me and haunt me

You made love lose all its charm

Chorus

It hurt like hell to let it go X3 (By the way singing this sounds way cooler than reading it!)

Verse 2

You demanded silence for my future

You thought I'd just forget with time

But I still hear the sound of tearing

Tattooed on every angle of my mind

You took my innocence for ransom

THen spilled it all over the floor

Now this gift I have is tarnished

NOt worth giving anymore

Chorus

Verse 3

You were all I thought I wanted

But I had to care for my own soul

I held out longer than I should've

Loosened my grip to his control

Chorus

It hurt like hell to let you go X3

Bridge

It took three years to do it

To break these chains of ungrace

and I could have held on forever

But I'd rather be held in your embrace

Chorus

There's peace when you let it go

Outro:

You seemed to think that it was easy

That's the farthest from the truth.

I'll try to explain it really simply. There has been some crazy bad moments in my life. Some could have been prevented, some not. Verse 1 refers to one specific, but could be more than one incident where I dated a person who was incredibly hurtful during the course of the relationship, so much so that words they have said haunted me for years after, pulling apart my self esteem.

Verse 2 refers to a time in my life where I was in a severely traumatic (not preventable) one time situation that forever changed my life and my identity. I probably do not need to SAY what happened.

Verse 3 refers to a relationship I was incredibly comfortable in and was very soon heading toward marriage, but God slowly nudged my heart and told me it wasn't right (after three years). He was right. I'm now married to a different man and if I hadn't let that go and listened to God, i wouldn't have met my alex and been married to the person I KNOW i'm supposed to be with.

The point of this song is that I can hold onto these pains for as long as I want to. I have a right to use them, to make me cynical, to make me street smart, to scare people with my stories. Or I can say you know what, it's gonna hurt a hell of a lot, but i need to carefully look back on the situation, dissect how it made me feel, then just let go of it. and that's what i did back when I wrote this song. I don't say those things dont' affect me anymore, because they do, but I am not a slave to the memory.

I'll post a happier song later this week!